Inspirations
by sg-1fanintn
Summary: Sam and Jack in a story first inspired by a photo from the Atlantis set. Dedicated to the SamJack Ship Family at Gateworld.
1. Chapter 1 Home

**CHAPTER 1: HOME**

_This story began with a discussion on the Sam/Jack Ship Family Discussion Thread on Gateworld. One of the thread members had just recovered from the 2007 con in Vancouver . While on her set tour, she spotted something she didn't even realize was important until she reviewed her photos. She couldn't show us the photo, but she did tell us about it...and someone commented that it would make a great fic. I volunteered to take the plot bunny and run with it. This story is the result._

_This story will have two chapters. It presumes an established Sam/Jack relationship._

She glanced across the room to the recliner where Jack was napping and smiled. He was fully reclined with his head turned to one side and his mouth slightly open. Stretched diagonally across the chair, his height caused his feet to hang off one side of the foot extension. On his lap were the paper's sports and comics sections. It was strange to see him so totally relaxed, his normally active eyes closed and his expression devoid of thought or emotion. She studied him for a minute, enjoying the sight of his tousled silver hair, his chiseled face and his well-toned body.

She couldn't remember the last time she had seen him this still in the daytime. Jack's energy level was always high and he was constantly on the move. It was nice to see him this calm. His life certainly didn't give him many opportunities to relax like this.

They had awakened that morning to the sound of light rain, and decided to enjoy it by staying in bed a little longer. Eventually, hunger tore them away from dozing and other, more energetic activities. So they got dressed, drove the truck into town, bought a newspaper and ordered brunch at the local diner. By the time they finished eating, the clouds had dissipated, creating a break in the rain. They headed back to the cabin, with Jack intent on doing some fishing. But along the drive, they encountered the storm again. It intensified, and by the time they reached the cabin, the rain was coming down in torrents. With fishing out of the question, they ran inside and decided to read the paper instead.

Jack took a deep breath and shifted in the chair, turning his head away from her. Smiling again, Sam decided to get up. She walked softly across the room to the bookshelves. She was studying them for some reading material she hadn't already devoured. She really needed to bring more books up here. It was then that her eyes were drawn to an item she had seen many times before. It was a small brass telescope, very exact in its detail. She lifted it from the shelf, turning it in her hands to examine it more closely.

"Whatcha doin'?" The sound of Jack's sleepy voice was unexpected, and she jumped in response, nearly losing her grip on the object.

"Jack! I almost dropped it!"

"Sorry," he yawned, letting the newspaper sections fall to the floor haphazardly as he stood and repeated the same stretching motions she had made just minutes ago. He walked over to where she stood, sliding his arms around her waist and nuzzling her neck.

"I've always meant to ask you where you got this," she said, trying to ignore the distraction created by his unexpected touch and his warm breath on her neck.

"My grandfather gave it to me."

"Is he the one who got you interested in astronomy?"

"In a way," he replied. "C'mere." He dragged her gently back to the couch. Once seated, he took the item from her. Then he studied it carefully, as if he was pulling memories from it. "My grandfather was the first person who noticed my interest in flying, and he was about the only person to take it seriously. So, he encouraged me…took me to air shows, bought books for me. When I was about nine, he bought a telescope and we started studying the constellations," he smiled. "Viewing here was great, 'cause it's so far out of town."

"Should be lots better than from the Springs," she said.

"Yeah," he replied. "I'll bring the scope next time we come up here, and we'll spend a night out under the stars."

"Like we haven't done that before," she chuckled.

"Yeah, but here, we don't have to worry that someone is going to shoot us!" he retorted.

They both laughed. Then, he paused for a moment, as if he was trying to choose just the right words. When he spoke again, his voice was soft. "Some of my best times growing up were spent with him. When we were here, we stayed up lots of nights, just watching the stars. Then, when I got out of high school and left for college, he gave me this. He said it would help me remember our times together…no matter where I was. And he said if I became a pilot, he could take the credit…because he had been my inspiration." He smiled. "I took it everywhere in my gear for years. When I felt low, or after a rough mission, I'd get it out, hold it….and it seemed to help me center myself." He paused again, taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly. "After he died and I inherited this place, I brought it here. I guess it's been sitting on that shelf for over 20 years."

Sam looked at the little scope; then, at her husband. Despite the strength of their relationship, it was unlike him to open up and discuss his past. Jack was a man who lived for the present and the future, not the past. For him to open up like this made her feel special, as if he had given her an unexpected gift. She put her hand gently on his arm and leaned over to place a kiss on his temple.

"What?" he asked softly, seeming confused.

"Thanks for sharing," she whispered with a smile.

He placed the telescope on the end table. Turning back to her, he brought a hand up to carefully caress her cheek. Brown eyes stared into blue. Then, wordlessly, he took her in his arms and held her close. As his hands gently caressed her back, she responded, running her hands through his hair and placing a line of kisses along his neck.

Then, letting go, he stood and held his hand out to her. She rose to meet him and for a few moments, they gazed into each others' eyes. He reached out to brush a lock of hair back from her face, looking at her as if trying to memorize each feature. Then, still holding her hand, he turned and led her to the bedroom.


	2. Chapter 2 Atlantis

**CHAPTER 2: ATLANTIS**

_Author's Note: Several people, after reading the first chapter, have asked for an explanation of the photo my friend took during the March 2007 con in Vancouver. I am happy to oblige._

_It was a photo of Dr. Weir's office. My friend shot it as the con-goers were ushered through the set tour, and they had to promise not to put the photos online. But when she looked back through her pics, she really saw the detail. The photos I describe in this chapter of the story were all on the set, as well as the little brass telescope! Since they were shooting S4 of SGA at the time, we feel TPTB have at least thrown the Sam/Jack Shippers that bone. _

_One note for my friend nell: I believe this story will satisfy your concerns about the regs, and how Sam & Jack handled them at the end of S8._

_We talk about stuff like this all the time at Gateworld's Sam/Jack Ship Family Discussion Thread. Please join us! Lots of nice people there!_

Sam sighed as she set her duffel bag on the desk in Dr. Weir's office…her office now, she reminded herself. Despite the eagles that sat on her shoulders, she didn't want to be here. She had been shocked when she learned of Elizabeth's injury. What a blow to the Atlantis expedition, especially so soon after Dr. Beckett's death! But Sam had learned, as the people here were learning, that nothing could prevent this type of loss. Danger was part of the job. Sam knew first-hand the personal toll it took on those affected. And she knew it would make her time here harder.

Sam prayed every night that Elizabeth would recover and return to Atlantis soon. But she also knew she had to make the best of this situation. She didn't want the command, but for now, she was assigned to Atlantis, and that was that. Jack had been so angry when he told her.

_// "Dammit, Sam! I argued every way I knew how to keep this from happening. But the I.O.C. insists you're the only person who is an acceptable substitute for Weir."_

_He paced the kitchen as she sat at the table watching. Jack was almost always fidgeting with something, but he rarely became this agitated._

"_What was their reasoning, Jack?"_

"_The emphasis on developing new technology. Your experience in that area was a big thing…plus your field experience and your record for managing crisis situations."_

"_But Daniel has all that…and he __**wants**__ the post."_

"_Ah, yes! That's what I thought! That's what I told them! But Daniel lacks the other thing they say is essential…military experience. You know there have been issues between Weir and some of the military commanders. The I. O. C. feels you can handle those conflicts better than Daniel could."_

_Sam sighed. She and Jack were just getting their lives on track. They had put so much time and effort into syncing their schedules, figuring out how to squeeze personal time in between their professional obligations. And now, all that work was for nothing. "What about the President?"_

_He stopped pacing and turned to face her. "I thought he might be my ace in the hole…convince him Danny could handle the job and keep you at the SGC…but no…he agreed with the I.O.C. I think what turned the tide was LaPierre's story about how you kept everyone from being eaten alive by those bugs at the Gamma Site. "_

"_I didn't save them," she said. "I just kept them out of harm's way until the Odyssey arrived."_

"_And boosted the output at the research station so Odyssey could pick up your personal transmitters," he reminded her. "That gave Odyssey a chance to beam you up before they wiped out the bugs."_

"_Yeah…well…" she shrugged._

"_Face it, Sam," Jack said bitterly. "I'm not the only person who realizes you're a national treasure."_

_She sighed. "Whatever. Either way, it's settled. I'm reassigned to Atlantis until Dr. Weir recovers…or until they decide she won't be able to return to duty and they need to name a permanent replacement."_

"_The President promised me one thing," he said, bringing his fist down on the table. "That decision will be made within a year…and you __**will not**__ be a candidate for the posting. If Weir is improving, but isn't quite ready to return, you could get stuck for a few more weeks…but you won't have to take the job permanently, no matter what."_

_She stretched out a hand to cover his fist. His hand was clenched so tightly that his knuckles had turned white. "Jack, this isn't the first time we've been separated…and it probably won't be the last. But we're married now, so we don't have to hide how we feel."_

_He sighed, the anger ebbing at her touch. Frustration still filled his face, though. "I know, but it's been hard enough to find some personal time across a continent. What is it going to be like across a galaxy?" Fist unclenched, he grasped her hand with both of his and began caressing her fingers. _

_He looked so sad. She desperately wanted to make him smile. "You're not worried that I'll run off with McKay, are you?"_

_He chuckled. "If you do, it'll be the result of an alien influence."_

"_You got that straight!" she laughed._

"_I forgot one thing," he said, looking up into her eyes, smiling slightly. "You get one week off for every six that you're there. So the only trick will be making sure I'm free when you come home."_

"_I assume that's one week---__**if**__ there isn't a crisis underway."_

"_Yeah," he grimaced. "But who's to say you might not need some assistance from your former commanding officer?"_

"_You're too valuable to risk," she said solemnly. "You don't need to be in Atlantis if there's a crisis underway. The last time you were there was just too close for comfort. You and I both know you were lucky to get out of there alive. "_

"_Oh…like I don't feel the same way about you!" he snapped in retort. He stared at their hands and took a deep breath before looking up to face her again. "Some sort of official business will bring me there. I haven't gone six weeks without seeing you in the whole 11 years I've known you. I don't want to start now!"_

"_Life was simpler when we were both doing field work," she said softly._

"_Yeah, in many ways it was," he agreed. "But my down time wasn't nearly as much fun as it Is now." A slight twinkle lit his eyes as he spoke._

"_Speaking of which…" She got up, walked to the side of the table where he was sitting and put her arms around his neck. Moving her hands lovingly down his chest, she leaned in close to his ear and whispered, "I know a certain General who hasn't made love to his wife in almost 12 hours."_

_He sat still for a moment, savoring the feel of her warm breath and the instincts her caresses stirred inside him. Then he stood, took her in his arms and kissed her. "You don't have to remind me twice," he whispered. His large, strong hands held her possessively. He moved them down her back and pulled her pelvis as close to his as possible._

"_So I noticed," she murmured, grinning. And they spent the rest of the afternoon in each other's arms. //_

She unzipped her bag to remove the photos she had brought back from leave. When she first arrived in Atlantis, she thought it would be easier not to bring personal reminders of home with her. She also thought that the fewer things she brought in, the more it would remind everyone that this was, after all, just a temporary assignment. But by the end of the first six weeks, she had changed her mind. In this place so far away from all those she loved, she craved some connection with them.

She had been more than ready for the time off. Luckily, no ugly crisis had reared its head. And while she was home on Earth, she had gathered a few precious memories to take back with her. She started pulling bubble wrap from the photos so she could find new homes for them.

One photo showed her father in his Air Force uniform. Smiling, she placed it on the credenza behind her desk. Next was a photo of Daniel in a tux, an enlargement from the wedding photos. A photo of Teal'c was unwrapped next, followed by one of Cassie. Finally, she pulled out a photo showing her fishing with Jack. It had been taken on that first trip to the cabin more than two years ago. She couldn't remember whether Daniel or Teal'c had taken the picture, but one of them had slipped around to the woods on the other side of the pond to snap the candid shot.

She smiled as she looked at the photo. It was her favorite of the two of them, showing them smiling at each other from lawn chairs pushed together on the dock. Each had a line in the water. But the real reason she loved the picture was because of what it symbolized.

That weekend had been the beginning of their new life together, and she considered it an even more important occasion than their wedding. Jack had suggested the trip to give her a change of scenery after her father's death. Knowing he was moving to Homeworld Security, he had invited Daniel and Teal'c too. He knew it would be their last chance to spend some quality time together for awhile. However, although he denied it, she also suspected he invited the boys so she would feel more comfortable coming along. She chuckled softly. _**He**_ might have been nervous, but since they had figured out how to be together without violating the regs, she would have gone with him alone.

Before the trip, they had acknowledged their feelings for each other and their intention to be together, no matter what it took. They had even shared some hugs and a few passionate kisses, but they hadn't yet slept together. However, with Jack's reassignment to Washington and hers to Area 51 just days away, they had placed more layers of command between his job and hers. So, they finally gave in to their feelings and consummated their relationship at the cabin

Being with Jack had been everything she always dreamed it would be. Her fantasies hadn't shortchanged her.

There had been no awkwardness, no unrealistic expectations and no disappointment. Instead, their first night sharing a bed was marked by newly declared love, intense passion and the years of trust they had built between them.

She had always hoped he would be that loving. He had always suspected she would be that passionate. And what they found in each other ignited an incredible experience for both of them.

She remembered how spent they were when it was over. She could still feel how closely he held her. And she would never forget that they had both cried. _**That**_ had taken them by surprise. But all those years of yearning to be together, of denying their feelings, of wanting each other so desperately, had intensified their emotional release, as well as their physical one.

Although their emotions were now on a more even keel, the physical release remained strong. They just seemed to fit, and both instinctively knew they were soulmates.

They had married within three months of that trip, and despite the long separations their work forced on them, she felt extremely lucky. She knew he did too, although he didn't discuss his emotions often. But he showed her in so many other ways: a look, an unexpected phone call, his tenderness in bed. It was clear that she belonged to Jack O'Neill, and it was clear that he belonged to her.

She felt tears forming as she thought about how far away he was. Mentally kicking herself, she wiped her free hand over her eyes before adding the fishing picture to the others. Stepping back, she gazed at the display and smiled, satisfied. This little bit of home, these photos of the people she loved, would help her to sustain her sanity until this assignment was over. She also had a wedding picture in her bag, but she planned to place it in her quarters. Although their relationship was public, she and Jack had agreed not to flaunt it.

She picked up the duffel bag and turned out the lights in the office. Closing the door, she began walking toward her quarters. It was late. The city was quiet. She passed a couple of people along the way, nodding and smiling to them. But no one asked her a question, and no one stopped her to get her opinion on an issue. Atlantis was on down time and there were no immediate threats on the horizon. For now, her time was hers.

Arriving at her quarters, she stepped inside and turned on a light. Placing the duffel on the bed, she unzipped it once more to retrieve the wedding photo. She set it on the table on "her" side of the bed. Just looking at it made her feel closer to him.

She began to gather up the bubble wrap she had used to protect the photos. As she rolled it into a neat cylinder, she noticed another piece peeking out of the corner of her bag. Puzzled, she reached out to find an additional small bundle. She had only undone one layer of the wrapping when she gasped, realizing what it was. Hurriedly, she removed the rest of the plastic, uncovering the small brass telescope Jack's grandfather had given him.

This time, she couldn't fight back the tears that sprang to her eyes as she held it. Jack had sent her back to Atlantis with one of his most prized possessions…something that was almost a piece of him.

As she wiped her eyes, she noticed an envelope that had fallen from the wrappings. She stooped to pick it up. Then, placing the telescope on the bed, she sat down to examine the envelope more closely. In Jack's handwriting, it said, "Sam," on the outside. She turned it over, slid her fingernail under the flap and tore it open.

The note inside read,

_Dear Sam,_

_As you've probably figured by now, I stashed this in your bag before we left the cabin. I knew you wouldn't take it unless I hid it in your gear. But here's the thing. After our talk, I realized you and that telescope have something in common. When I was younger, it inspired me to get my wings, become an officer and make my grandfather proud. But I want different things in life now, and I have a different inspiration…my beautiful, brilliant wife…the national treasure. Knowing you have this telescope with you in Atlantis makes me feel good…so no arguing! I'm sure my grandfather would approve._

_I miss you…and I love you._

_Jack_

The tears were rolling down her cheeks as Sam slipped the note back into the envelope. She grabbed a tissue from the bedside table and held it to her eyes. She sat there for several minutes, drying the tears and thinking about how lucky she was to be Sam Carter O'Neill. Despite the hard times, despite the battles, despite the challenges and the enemies and the losses, she was blessed with good friends, important work…and the love of a truly incredible man. Tomorrow, she would take the little brass telescope to her new office and place it on a shelf where she could see it from her desk. And when she had a tough decision to make, or when the distance between her and her loved ones got to be too much, she would look at it…and center herself so she could steer through whatever challenges lay ahead.


	3. Chapter 3 New Command

_Author's note: So many people asked me to continue this story that I have changed its status from "complete" to "in progress." This year, I'll be writing fic tags to Sam's Stargate Atlantis eps…and posting them here. This story is S/J established. This chapter also contains Sheppard/Weir ship overtones. Just sayin'._

The door to her quarters closed behind an exhausted Colonel. Sam took a deep breath as she closed her eyes, let her body slump back against the door and embraced the quiet. Finally—a moment alone—a chance to relax. For the past 48 hours, she had been very conscious of the scores of eyes on her…and she had done her best to be the epitome of a calm, confident, decisive leader.

From the moment she arrived, Sam had been in the spotlight, but she had expected that. She stepped through the gate in dress blues with a few words prepared, because she thought Sheppard would have key base staff there to greet her. But she hadn't anticipated her first two challenges…staring down the intimidating form of Ronon Dex…and having to keep her composure while Rodney spoke of the "unrequited lust" he imagined between them. She shuddered. Well, at least he was seeing someone now. Hopefully, that would prevent him from following her around with puppy dog eyes and inappropriate comments.

She had thrown a few things in drawers, tried to get her bearings on the unfamiliar base and led a team on a rescue mission to a Wraith hive ship. She sighed. Never a dull moment. She had hoped for a couple of slow days to get acclimated, but she had worked at the SGC too long to ever expect normalcy.

She was beginning to understand how Jack felt when he first took over as commander of the SGC. He was in familiar surroundings, of course, but after years as the base's most outspoken maverick, the transition was hard for him. She knew it was also hard for him to send his old team into action while he stayed behind. After eight years, he was used to watching their backs. In retrospect, she supposed that might have even been harder for him than this transition would be for her. He had to present a new persona to people who knew him and had certain expectations of what he would do and how he would react. She only had to establish authority in a different environment. But she did face the uphill battle of replacing a beloved commander who had been taken from her people by force. Sam wished Elizabeth was still here. Then, she would still be on Earth…not here in Atlantis, feeling completely out of her element.

Sam sighed. Unfortunately, Elizabeth _**was**_ gone, at least for now, and the I.O.A. had given her an assignment as a result. Sam was determined to do her duty. And as much as the scientist in her was excited to be here, her heart already ached for home, and for Jack.

Jack. Switching on the lights in her quarters, she crossed over to the picture frame and picked it up. Warm brown eyes stared out at her, and an involuntary smile rose to her lips. It was a photo Daniel had snapped several years ago while SG-1 was on a mission. Jack was wearing field gear and a baseball cap, and an irreverent sparkle lit his eyes. She loved the picture because it captured the essence of the man she had come to know as a colleague and friend, long before they began to think of each other in a romantic way.

Had it really only been three days since Jack held her and kissed her good-bye? Somehow, it seemed longer. But, she admitted with a sigh, they were used to being apart from each other. For years, they had spent almost every day together, separated by regulations that kept them from being honest about their feelings. Then, once they had been able to begin a relationship, they were separated by two-thirds of a continent, with her work in the Rockies and his job in DC. Now, they faced a new separation, as he remained on Earth while she was reassigned to command Atlantis. Such was life.

**S&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&J**

"_Hey," he had said softly, as he snuggled up to her in bed, "I'll only be an energy burst away. Besides, it's just two jumps and 30 minutes from the SGC to where you'll be. I'm sure I can find a reason for another official visi. And you'll come home on leave. Except for the phone calls, it won't be any different than how we're living now."_

"_I know," she replied, as she gently stroked the arms around her waist, "but it __**seems**__ like such a big change."_

"_**You're**__ the one who saved their whiny necks from those bugs last year. Maybe if you hadn't been such a hero that day, they would have given Sheppard a try."_

"_It would have been a moot point…because if Colonel Emerson hadn't beamed us out of there when he did, we'd all be dead." _

_She sighed. Reading her thoughts, he voiced his agreement. "Paul Emerson was a good officer."_

"_We've lost a lot of good people," she murmured. "Including Elizabeth Weir."_

"_But no one handles a crisis better than you, Carter," he chuckled. "In fact, I have one for you now."_

"_And that would be?"_

_He turned her toward him, gazing into her eyes. "My wife is going away tomorrow, and she's not paying enough attention to me."_

_She giggled. "Jack…you've always had my attention."_

"_Prove it."_

_Snaking her arms away from his neck and down his torso, she replied huskily, "No problem."_

**S&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&J**

A knock on the door interrupted her pleasant thoughts. Setting the photo back on the table next to her laptop, she rose, crossed the room and pushed the button that opened the door. "Colonel Sheppard…"

"Sorry to bother you, Colonel Carter. I just wanted to see if you needed anything."

She smiled. "I'm fine, John. I'll finish unpacking tomorrow, and I'll be all settled in." He seemed uneasy standing there, as if there was something he needed to say, but couldn't find the right words. "Colonel, did you need to speak with me about something?"

"I just wanted to tell you that it was good having you out in the field with us today…and if someone new had to come here…well…I'm glad they sent you."

"Thanks," she said warmly. "I just wanted to help. I have a lot to learn about this place, Colonel, and I hope you're willing to be a resource for me."

"Glad to help in any way I can, ma'am," he smiled. He stood there a moment, then spoke again. "Well, that's really all I had to say. I'm sure you're tired, and I'm sorry again to interrupt. I…I just wanted to tell you that."

"I appreciate it…really, I do," she said.

"Well…I'll be going then," he replied, turning to walk away. She was about to hit the button that would close her door when he stopped and spoke again.

"Oh, and Colonel…"

"Yes?"

"About Elizabeth…"

"Yes?"

"I'm going to continue to lobby for a rescue mission."

"I'd expect nothing less."

A grin spread across his face. "Yes, ma'am." And with that, he was gone.

Sam closed the door, then turned and walked back to the table. She pulled out the chair and sat down. She wanted to write a note to Jack while the events of the past two days were still fresh in her mind. And when the energy burst went out in the morning, her message would be part of the transmission.

After gazing at his photo for a few moments, she began writing. She wrote of meeting the Wraith for the first time, of John's concern for Elizabeth Weir, of Ronon's pain at being betrayed by his friends…and of her latest odd exchange of words with McKay. Some of these topics would be revisited in her official reports, but the tone would be different. This was a letter from a wife to the husband she missed very much. And when she was done, she planned to get a good night's sleep before the next crisis occurred.


	4. Chapter 4 Down Time

**CHAPTER 4: DOWN TIME**

_My thanks to everyone who has responded so warmly to this shippy little series. I hope you continue to enjoy it. This chapter is based on what has happened in SGA Season 4 so far, and Sam's absence from Atlantis during last week's episode. I know where I think she was. That's my story...and I'm sticking to it!_

_NOTES: _

_1. Substantial spoilers for season 4 through Doppelganger. If you don't want to know, please don't read!_

_2. Note to the Sam/Jack Ship Family at Gateworld: Each section of my story is divided by the initials, "S&J," repeated x14. You know why!!!_

Jack shut the door with a smile. The princess, the bumblebee and the ninja had left his front porch smiling, after he added several pieces of chocolate to each of their baskets. He glanced at the clock—8:45. That was probably it. Another Halloween had come and gone. That meant he finally had time to figure out the little mystery that had been puzzling him all night.

Setting down the bowl of candy, he palmed one piece. Placing his fingers on either side of the small cellophane packet, he pulled it apart. Task accomplished, he popped the small, round marshmallow-like object into his mouth. Rolling it across his tongue for a moment, he positioned it in the center of his mouth and carefully bit into it. A sweet, gel-like substance was released. Pushing the marshmallow to the sides of his mouth, he concentrated on the gel. He just couldn't figure out what was in it! Ok…the candy was supposed to be eyeballs, the perfect bit of harmless horror for Halloween. He knew the kids would love them, and he had been right. But he had been popping these things all evening, and he just couldn't figure out what was in that gel! Maybe if he had just one more….

He was reaching for another cellophane wrapper when a hand reached out to stop him. "Jack…don't you think you've had enough of those?"

He turned with a grin. "I'm just trying to figure out what's in the gel in the center."

"Sugar," she said. "Lots and lots of sugar."

He turned to take her in his arms. "I guess I could substitute something else sweet instead."

"Substitute? I don't think I like the sound of that."

"Ah, you know what I mean," he grinned sheepishly, running a hand from the small of her back down to her backside. "There's no substitute for you, Carter," her murmured, pulling her closer and lowering his head to nuzzle her neck. He felt her lean into him, her arms curling around his neck as the fingers of one hand gently ruffled his hair. She felt so good against him, and tomorrow, she'd be gone…again.

"Packed?" he asked, pulling back to look into her deep blue eyes.

She nodded, moving to trace the outline of his face with her fingers.

"What's the plan?"

"I'll ride to the Pentagon with you. Daedelus is in orbit. They'll beam me up from there."

He nodded. She had been home on leave for almost two weeks…two weeks of her soft, warm body pressed up against his in bed at night. Two weeks of shared dinners…and several sensational shared showers. Two weeks of rented movies and TV on the couch in the evenings. Two weeks of laughter, making love and talking late into the night.

"Hey," she said. "Earth to Jack. We still have the rest of the night…that is, if you aren't sluggish after all that sugar."

"Nah…I'm in the middle of a sugar rush."

She giggled, pulled out of his embrace and began to walk down the hall toward the bedroom. He just stood there and grinned, fascinated at the magic that was Sam Carter O'Neill. "C'mon." She held her hand out. Shaking himself out of his trance, he followed her---quickly.

**S&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&J**

She closed the dresser drawer on the lacy gown she had washed that afternoon. She sure wouldn't need _**it**_ in Atlantis. She turned and looked around their bedroom. The gown had been the last of the laundry. The towels and sheets were neatly lined up in the linen closet, and Jack had six weeks of clean socks and underwear stashed in the dresser. She didn't _**have**_ to do the laundry, but it had kept her busy while Jack was entertaining himself with the trick or treaters. And strangely, she found some sort of satisfaction in the task. It was a project that could be sorted, run and completed in a short time. It played to the quirks of her linear mind.

She sighed. Her two weeks at home were almost over. Tomorrow, she would head back to Atlantis, back to her new command.

These two weeks had been cathartic…lots of time talking with Jack, laughing with Jack…touching…Jack. She smiled. They had made a lot of good memories. She hoped the warmth she felt now would last until they could carve out some more together time.

There had been an embassy party, an evening at the theatre and several memorable dinners out. But the best times had been the ones spent at home, just the two of them. They had caught up on the movies they had missed, and they had consumed a lot of popcorn. And on the few days Jack managed to avoid going to the office, they had stayed in bed. She felt her stomach do a little flip as she thought about it, and she chuckled to herself as her face flushed in response. She was still overwhelmed by how much she enjoyed holding him and being held by him. The sex, which after this long should have become routine, was still amazing. And after two weeks at home with him, she was again addicted to his touch. She chuckled to herself, wondering how she would cope with the withdrawal when she returned to work.

Of course, he had wanted to hear everything about her new command…although she was sure her daily report dispatches were stacked on his desk. She had told him about getting acquainted with the people who made up the Atlantis expedition, and about their struggle over Dr. Weir's loss. She giggled at his expression when she relayed details of Rodney McKay's welcome visit to her quarters. She recounted the déjà vu experience with the crystalline entity, and she told him about the raid on the Wraith hive ship. His face had clouded up during that story, and when she finished, he had looked at her solemnly. "Ya know, Carter, it's bad enough that you're a galaxy away. But remember that you're not part of a field unit anymore. You don't take the risks now. You're playing the role of Hammond. You're supposed to make good decisions, and see that field units get the support they need. That was the deal."

"Jack, when did you start questioning my judgment?"

"I'm not questioning your—"

"Yes, you are."

"No, no…not in the way you think. I just want you to do everything you can to come home safely, and heading off on a suicide mission where you're outnumbered hundreds to one by life-sucking aliens isn't my idea of staying safe."

"My gut told me I needed to go…and I wanted to establish credibility with these people."

"And that was the only way to do it? We respected Hammond, and he rarely left the SGC."

"And I'll probably do the same thing. But you've been telling me for years that I'm ready for command, and now that I have one, you're already questioning me."

"I'm just sayin'…"

"I know what you're saying, Jack…and believe me…I want the same things you do. But I had to do it…_**that time."**_

He shook his head and looked away, and they had spent the next few moments in an awkward silence. He was the one who finally broke it. "Sam…just don't take any unnecessary risks, ok? Promise me."

"I promise, Jack."

"We've just waited too long and…" He was looking down as his right hand gestured vaguely.

"I know, Jack," she said softly, reaching out to still his hand and hold it tightly. "I know…and I promise."

He looked up then, and she thought she saw tears glistening in his eyes. But no tears fell as he returned her gaze. He had pulled her into a hug, and she resolved to keep her word to him. After all, they had spent too many years sacrificing their own wants and needs for the job.

She sound of the doorbell broke her train of thought. She smiled as she heard Jack doing silly voices to entertain the children who had appeared at their door. Laughing softly to herself, she shook her head. Glancing at the clock, she noticed it was almost 8:45. Trick or treat activities should be almost over. It was time to redirect her husband's entertaining efforts. This was their last night together for awhile, and there were other things they should both be doing.

**S&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&JS&J**

She smiled and waved at him as her image shimmered, then vanished. Hands in his pockets, he watched for another moment, rocking on his heels as if he was expecting her to re-appear. Then he turned, opened the door and walked into the outer office, where his assistant was waiting with a stack of messages.

"General, you have calls from the I. O. A. Liaison Office, Congressman Tannbeckr and Dr. Jackson at the SGC."

He held his hand out to take the slips of paper from her hand, turned around and started back toward his office.

"And General, remember that you have an appointment with the Joint Chiefs in a half-hour…"

"Got it, Louise." He waved in acknowledgement as he shut the door. Tossing the messages on the desk, he took off his jacket, tossed it over a side chair and plopped down in his chair.

She was gone…again. Why was it so hard? For years, they had been together every day, but were unable to act on the emotions they felt. He didn't think anything could be as hard as that…but this felt strangely familiar.

Placing his elbows on his desk, he leaned forward and ran his hands through his hair. Then he sat up, sifted through the messages and picked up the phone. Back to work. He'd knock out these calls, go to his meeting and by then, the day should be almost over.

Maybe he'd work late…catch up on a little paperwork. Once most people went home, he could usually get a lot more done. He reached in the middle desk drawer for a pen. But his eye was drawn to an envelope with his name written on it. Opening it, he found the short message:

_Dear Jack,_

_I promise._

_Love--always,_

_Sam_

He smiled. Just a few more weeks…


End file.
